(The Most Insignificant
And Least
Observed Homepage
On The Web!!!)
A.K.A. the Official
Armpit of the Internet
Surgeon General's Warning: This web site may be hazardous to
your health. It has been know to cause cancer in many lab animals, especially
wombats. If you are a wombat, please leave this page immediately.
Note: The above statement
requires a certain talent known as "reading between the lines"
Before you naively explore the doom-ridden
contents of this page, let me give you my own forewarning:
BE FOREWARNED: The contents of this site may or may not
be childish, goofy and utterly pointless. However, it is objectively
weird. If you is alergic to bad grammer, pour speelinge and iMpropper
using! of punC;Tua lizaTion"?#, then do not read this sentence. Also,
if you really hate it when people don't finish their sentences, then I suggest
that you. The owner of this site will not be responsible for any injuries,
deaths or other boo-boos incurred by this site, and if presented with a lawsuit
anyway, the owner will not have any choice but to...run away at top speed,
whilst muttering cuss words under his breath, to his secret hide-out.
You must be at least 18 years old in order to smoke while viewing this web
page, and at least 21 in order to drink while browsing it. *Warning*
This is the end of the forewarning, (would that make this a "hindwarning"?)
so it now safe to shake your head in disgust and think such thoughts as "Man,
whoever made this site is mental!" or "Why am I actually reading the
contents of somebody's personal homepage? Am I nuts?"
Anyway, my name is Nate Harburg and I....what
are you doing? Probably thinking to yourself that you don't care who
I am or what my favorite color is, right? Well I don't care who you
are either, then! So there! And even if you don't care
to know, my favorite color is !
WAIT!!! DONT CLICK THAT BACK BUTTON! OR THE CLOSE BUTTON!! HEY WHAT ARE
YOU DOING...NO! How Dare you type that web address in there!
Naughty Naughty! Shame on you! What would your Mother say!...Well,
now that I have your attention, I can articulate on the purpose of this absurd homepage.
"Vittles (gulp) is proof (gulup) that God loves us!" (BRAAAAAP)"
Thesis Statement
of the "Mialohow" Homepage:
Upon analyzing the indefinitely slimy vortex of the postulate and the quadrangle
of the circumventing coaxle blobby transmogrifier, I have come to the scientific
conclusion that there are eight main subjects to be discussed in this site.
If you have intelligent questions and/or hate mail, please
give me an "electronic ring."Do
not send any questions dealing with trains travelling at 55 mph leaving from
New York at 2:00 and departing from Boston at 11:42, even if you really
do need to know what time they will meet up. I'm telling you, I just
don't know the answer. Also, please note that I will not even bother to read
messages containing raunchy subjects or ones that have deadly, contagious
viruses attached. Thanks
Copyright (like that means anything nowadays) 1999 Nate Harburg
last updated: July 2003
